Old School Pay-Per-View Review
Survivor Series 1992
This one was interesting, to say the least. Only one match that took place at the event lasted longer than twenty minutes, and that was the Main Event between The Heartbreak Kid Shawn Michaels and The Hitman Bret Hart. I actually wrote about the match in Bret’s, “Wrestler Spotlight,” but it deserves more coverage. The rest of this Pay-per-view, however, was not exactly overflowing with quality matches. So, in an effort to get as much out of the 1992 Survivor Series as possible, I’ve decided to break it up, match by match. Hopefully that will make it easier.
The Headshrinkers (Samu & Fatu) vs. High Energy (Koko B. Ware & Owen Hart)
See what I’m saying about this one? How am I supposed to sell this match to people? Go watch three guys you’ve probably never heard of, and Owen Hart. Samu and Fatu have a family legacy, at least. It’ll be interesting for people to learn their connections to men like The Rock, Roman Reigns, and Jimmy Snuka. Koko B. Ware, however, is known only to those who were old enough to watch during the period of time he wrestled during. Everybody knows Owen, but why go watch this, when you can go watch any of his much, much better matches?
Big Boss Man vs. Nailz
This match was absolutely awful. It was a Nightstick on a Pole match. That means there was a nightstick secured to the top of a pole, and the winner would be whoever climbed up and grabbed the nightstick to use on his opponent. Honestly, the most interesting talking point this match creates is the fact that Nailz was the dude who got fired for attacking Vince McMahon. He had his buddy watching the door and went in on Vinny Mac. Then, when Vince was later on trial due to charges associated with a steroid scandal, Nailz was caught being petty on the stand, causing the prosecution to call for his testimony to be ignored by the jury. That massive WWE steroid scandal is a story for another time.
Tatanka vs. Rick Martel
This is a match that only could have been on a Pay-per-view during this time period. There’s no way it would’ve been put on a PPV during the Attitude Era, or the Ruthless Aggression Era. Maybe in the dark ages of the reign of the fatal four: John Cena, Randy Orton, Triple H, and Batista. I saw those four guys mix and match so many times, for so many years, that they all just blurred into one, incredibly long, and unbelievably boring match. I’ll file this match in the same category.
Macho Man Randy Savage & Mr. Perfect (replacing Ultimate Warrior) vs. Ric Flair & Razor Ramon
This is more like it, now. Those four competitors are some of the biggest names in the history of the business. How could putting them together be anything but a license to print money? Razor wasn’t quite the legend he’d become at the time, but he had a ton of heat on him. Razor Ramon was one of the biggest heels in the company then, which is why he was partnered with Ric Flair, the biggest heel in the company. This was a great match that could have gone on for a lot longer than the chaotic finish allowed.
Yokozuna vs. Virgil
This was a squash match of the highest order. Virgil, for all his talent, is most well known as The Million Dollar Man Ted DiBiase’s assistant. There was no way he was going to be allowed to go over the monster, Yokozuna, and as expected, Yoko got the win within four minutes of in-ring time.
Four on Four Survivor Series Elimination Match
The Nasty Boys (Jerry Sags & Brian Knobbs) and The Natural Disasters (Earthquake & Typhoon)
Money Inc. (Ted DiBiase & Irwin R. Schyster) and The Beverly Brothers (Beau & Blake Beverly)
Phew, that was a long one to type out. I’ve always loved the Survivor Series elimination matches, but this may be one of my least favorites. Ted DiBiase was the most talented guy in the ring. As a kid, I used to like Sags and Knobbs, but when I grew up, and saw more and more tag teams work, I realized The Nasty Boys were never very good. They had plenty of presence, sure, but what did that presence ever denote? They look like a couple fat, obnoxious slobs you’d have to fight with at a s–tty dive bar after one or both of them hit on your girlfriend. Then there’s Earthquake and Typhoon, a couple of monsters who could’ve torn me apart with their bare hands if they wanted to.
Professionally and personally, I try not take anything away from any of the guys I write about. However, as a fan, the only person in this match that I have ever missed in a ring is The Million Dollar Man.
The Undertaker vs. Kamala in a “Coffin Match”
This was the precursor to Taker’s casket match at Royal Rumble 1994 with Yokozuna. They were calling it a “Coffin Match”, but it’s the same thing as a casket match.
I love Undertaker, have since I was a child, but this was a less than six minute match with a big, fat slob who used to paint his big, fat belly.
HBK vs. Bret Hart for Bret’s WWF Championship
In another precursor to a later match, Shawn and Bret wrestled their first Main Event PPV match, and it was the proverbial show-stopper. I suppose that was the point. They were given the most time on the broadcast by almost ten minutes. The only one that came close was the star-studded tag match with Perfect, Savage, Ramon and Flair. Vince obviously wanted two of his younger stars to go out there and show the fans what they were capable of, and the Hitman and the Icon did not disappoint.
This is an underrated match in their canon. The Heartbreak Kid hadn’t fully gotten a hold of his gimmick yet, so people tend to chalk this up as a pre-HBK affair, but it was anything but. This was the beginning of a long career of stealing spotlight from others, though it would take Shawn another four years before he’d win his first WWF Championship at WrestleMania 12.