Wrestler Of The Week
Perry Saturn is a Hero
This is going to be one of those rare cases where the Wrestler of the Week isn’t one who is currently working. Instead, the wrestler of my week was Perry Arthur Satullo. Wrestling fans will know him better as Perry Saturn, one time member of Raven’s Flock. I had always heard the Saturn legend. It’s a tale that wrestling fans have traded back and forth for years. I never dug any further, though. I was always content to take it a face value: Perry Saturn stopped a rape. That was enough for me to look at the man differently every time I saw him.
Little did I know, the story is a lot more intense than that. It’s one of bravery, consequences, personal demons, and redemption, and more people need to know it. Perry Saturn deserves to be recognized for his heroics.
In April of 2004, Perry was involved in an altercation with two men who were raping a young woman. See, that’s fancy people talk for Perry Saturn saw a woman being raped and sprung into action. He didn’t hesitate a second, immediately throwing himself in harm’s way to help the woman. He ended up shot by a .25 multiple times for his trouble, including once in the neck and once in the right shoulder. In his YouShoot, Saturn said he thought he got punched when the bullet hit his shoulder. That’s insane. Dude got shot and was essentially like, “did anybody feel that breeze?”
During his recovery, Saturn became addicted to Methamphetamine and ended up homeless for several years, practically disappearing off the face of the earth. Nobody knew where he was, not even his friends or family. That’s a movie right there!
[Some unfortunate homeless kid ends up under the care of hardened hero, Perry Saturn, now a homeless man just trying to get by. Then, I don’t know, the kid’s father is a ninja and he sends a bunch of other ninjas to retrieve his son, but the kid doesn’t want to go. Saturn has to fight a bunch of ninjas to protect the kid. After he takes care of them, obviously he has to confront the kid’s dad, the evil ninja. He’s an evil ninja now. Imagine that: homeless Perry Saturn fighting an evil ninja on a mountainside, the moon is huge and glowing in the background.]
Sorry, don’t mind me, I’m just…trying to bring some light to a really dark situation. The recovery process must have been a nightmare for Saturn. I can’t even begin to think about how I’d handle what he had to. He did the right thing. By all accounts, his actions were truly heroic. It’s stories like his that scare others from doing the right thing. A lot of people would not have reacted in the same way that he did. A lot of people would have felt the Genovese Effect, so named after Kitty Genovese, who was murdered in an attack that lasted, at first, thirty minutes. The man had his way with Kitty on a clearly visible street, while she screamed and pleaded for help. Then, the guy left, only to return ten minutes later and finish her off. This is according to eye witness reports.
There were eye witness reports! That means people watched for over forty minutes as this woman was brutalized. I called it the Genovese Effect because that’s the case I’m most familiar with. It’s more properly known as the Bystander Effect.
I don’t want anyone to focus on where Saturn ended up for a while. The truth is, everything has consequences, whether your actions are good or bad. The pain from being shot in the neck is one I cannot event fathom, so I have no idea what kind of s–t I’d end up taking if I had to deal with it. I’d be seven different kinds of f–ked up on a daily basis, and yeah, I’d probably end up homeless. Hopefully I’d be able to pull it together like Perry Saturn did.
He reemerged in 2009, showing the world that Perry Saturn was, in fact, alive and kicking. He also married Lisa Marie Kuhlemeier that year, which is really awesome. There’s a light at the end of every tunnel. If there’s no light, you’re either not in a tunnel, or it collapsed and you’re a dead person. As long as you’re floating upon this mortal plain, still clad in your mortal coil, things can always get better. Saturn used to sell his character in WCW as one who carried himself with pride and integrity. His character was the kind of guy who took the word respect very seriously.
Well, I have to say, my respect for Perry Saturn shot through the roof after I learned about all of this. He’s a genuine hero, and I’d watch him kick the s–t out of ninjas any day.